BREAKING THROUGH BEING “STUCK”
During my many years of working with survivors of trauma, complex trauma, and PTSD, I have noticed how the effects of being traumatized have fueled a place of being stuck in “victimhood”. This is especially the case if you have not ever addressed your “trauma wounds” so that you can begin to heal
The past cannot be healed in the past
You Are Not Defined by What Happened to You
When you’ve been hurt, betrayed, or abused, it can feel like you’ll never rise above it — like you’ll always carry the label of victim. You may feel stuck in shame, anger, or fear, believing your past has stolen your future. But you are not what happened to you — and your story doesn’t have to end this way.
At Ronee Miller Counseling in Tribeca, NYC, I offer in-person therapy to help you process the pain, reclaim your worth, and begin to walk in your own quiet victory. Together, we can tend to the wounds you’ve carried and help you discover the strength and courage you already hold inside. Call me today at 📞 (212) 349-6544 or click here to visit my website and take your first step toward healing and wholeness.
you can only be healed as you begin to heal in the present. You may feel “stuck” and “wounded” and have lost hope that you can ever move forward in all areas of your life without the }baggage” of your past
. See: ” Understanding The Trauma Recovery Process”.
Please know that having been a survivor of trauma is not a death sentence and that you can begin to be fully alive(mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically) as you move from having been a victim to victory as you put into practice some of the tools needed for you to no longer define your identity as a “victim” but as one “who has gone through the fire and coming out gold”! You no longer have to live a life of “stuckness” but can begin to see yourself as a “work in progress” as healing is a process: so be patient with yourself.
What Therapy With Me Is Like
Therapy with me is not about judgment or blame — it’s about creating a safe, private space where your voice, your story, and your feelings matter. In my peaceful, pet-friendly home office in Tribeca, NYC, you’ll experience what it feels like to be deeply seen and heard.
We’ll move at your pace, uncovering the places where you feel stuck in a victim mindset, and gently opening the door to new possibilities — strength, confidence, forgiveness, and self-compassion. At Ronee Miller Counseling, I’ll walk with you every step of the way as you find your way from victimhood to victory.
TIME TO GIVE YOURSELF TIME AND ATTENTION
In order for you to heal from the inside out it is essential that you begin to notice your thought life and your feelings and patterns of emotions and reactions. Before you can ever communicate effectively with anyone else in a relationship you need to develop a relationship with yourself.
Spending time with you and getting to know yourself and “feeling safe” in your own body is an essential part of your healing process. Making “you” a priority not in a “narcissistic” way but with compassion and kindness. During this time you can start to know what you like and what you do not and have the “people pleasing” spirit broken off you as you learn to set boundaries and limits. See: ”Identifying Adult Wounds Of Childhood Trauma”
Time is love so as you make your healing from “victim mentality” a priority you will need to cut out whatever is blocking that process.
You may have become relationship or substance or food addicted in an attempt to soothe yourself but can now understand that this is toxic and fuels your feeling like a victim” If you avoid “you” then you cannot heal.. It is time to know what your issues are and to address them so you can move forward with power! See: ” Childhood Trauma Is The Root Of Addiction”
.
COURAGE TO SPEAK AND COMMUNICATE
You may frequently feel angry and misunderstood and back in “victim mode” as a consequence of not understanding that your voice has power. Your words have power and No One Can Read Your Mind! You must have the courage to speak. You need to constantly remind the “little boy or little girl” part of you that you are no longer a hostage or a slave and you have a voice as you “exist”.
When you do not speak it is interpreted as agreement. One of the most effective ways to learn to have your own voice and identify your thoughts and feelings in a safe place;is when you are in therapy with the “right therapist”. You cannot skip this step and heal so be courageous and begin to seek therapy! See: “Speaking The Truth In Love”
SAYING GOODBYE TO LEARNED HELPLESSNESS
Learned helplessness is a psychological concept that occurs when individuals repeatedly face negative situations and feel powerless to change their circumstances. This sense of powerlessness can lead to a cycle of feeling stuck in victimhood, where one believes that they have no control over their life or outcomes. This mindset can become a significant barrier to personal growth and success.
When you adopt a perspective of learned helplessness, you may begin to internalize the belief that your efforts are futile. This belief can stem from past experiences where attempts to improve your situation were met with failure or adversity. Over time, this can create a mental pattern where you no longer try to effect change, leading to passivity and resignation.
Being stuck in victimhood can feel comfortable in the short term because it offers an explanation for your struggles and shields you from the discomfort of facing challenges directly. However, this comfort is deceptive. Remaining in this state can prevent you from recognizing your strengths and capabilities, keeping you from taking action that could lead to positive change.
Victorious living requires recognizing your agency and the power you have to influence your circumstances. To break free from learned helplessness, you need to challenge the negative beliefs that hold you back. This involves reframing your thoughts and acknowledging that setbacks do not define your ability to succeed. Embracing small wins and taking proactive steps, even in the face of adversity, can gradually shift your mindset from one of helplessness to one of empowerment.
Acknowledging the distinction between being a victim and a victor is crucial. While external circumstances may be challenging, your internal response is within your control. By taking ownership of your life and choices, you can begin to dismantle the barriers imposed by learned helplessness. This proactive approach allows you to reclaim your narrative and move toward a more fulfilling and victorious existence!
🌿 Invitation:
If you've been stuck in a painful story, feeling more like a victim than the strong, resilient person you truly are, you're not alone. Healing is possible — and you don’t have to do it alone. In our work together, we gently tend to the wounds that have kept you small, shamed, or silenced. With presence, compassion, and the steady truth of who you were always meant to be, we walk the path from pain to freedom.
An Invitation to Begin
Even if it feels like you’ve been beaten down for too long, it’s never too late to rise. You are more than your wounds — and healing is possible.
I invite you to reach out to me at Ronee Miller Counseling in Tribeca, NYC and begin your journey from victim to victory today. Call me at 📞 (212) 349-6544 or click here to visit my website. You don’t have to walk this path alone — and I would be honored to walk it with you.