💬 Understanding the Roots of Relationship Drama
What looks like “drama” on the surface is often a cry for connection underneath. When we haven’t felt truly seen, heard, or valued — especially in early relationships — we can develop patterns of emotional reactivity, withdrawal, or control that sabotage intimacy. These patterns aren’t flaws; they’re old survival strategies trying to protect you.
At Ronee Miller Counseling in Tribeca, NYC, we’ll explore how these patterns formed and gently work to bring healing to the younger, more vulnerable parts of you that learned to expect disconnection or chaos. Healing the roots helps shift the dynamic — from drama to deeper connection.
Call 📞 (212) 349-6544 or click here to begin the journey.hen we are in a relationship, every place we have been wounded in the past comes up. It may not come up into your conscious awareness but your body feels and holds all the traumatic memories of the past that have not been processed and healed and these wounds can fester and run our lives….and our choices in relationships.
See: “ Neglect and Emotional Neediness”
Though you long to have a loving relationship in the present the parts of you that may have never experienced that can get in the way and block that from happening, When we are not given the nurturance and emotional attunement in the womb and as babies and children then it becomes difficult to trust others and to trust ourselves.. You may never have experienced what it is like to be “seen, heard, felt” but are very familiar with feeling unsafe, scared, shamed, and overwhelming “aloneness” when you need connection, hugs, and attunement..
. As children we are like “little hostages” as we are completely vulnerable and dependent on our caregivers for survival and there is no way to escape except by complying and stuffing our emotions: fight/flight/freeze. So fast forward we can be like “sheep among wolves”( in our relationship choices that set us up to choose Mr. or Miss Wrong)) but we are unable to discern “danger ahead” and to protect ourselves until we give those wounded parts created by childhood trauma to receive attention so healing can begin.
💬 What Therapy With Me Is Like
In our sessions together, we create a steady space where your nervous system can settle and your heart can open — free from blame, shame, or judgment. We’ll slow down enough to notice what triggers you in relationship, what your body feels in those moments, and what deeper longings are being stirred.
Whether you’ve been told you’re “too sensitive” or find yourself reacting before you can even think, we’ll work together to bring clarity and compassion to your inner world. At Ronee Miller Counseling, I offer in-person therapy grounded in presence, curiosity, and the belief that repair is always possible.
Call 📞 (212) 349-6544 or click here to visit my website to schedule.
RED FLAGS FOR AVOIDING MR.AND MISS WRONG:
FAMILIAR DOES NOT MEAN “GOOD OR HEALTHY OR SAFE”
Mr.or Miss Wrong may feel like a “great”relationship choice to you initially. And over time the reality sets in and you start to notice more issues that come up with your partner that feel familiar (as does your experience) Your partner may not express affection freely or know how to communicate openly, has angry tirades, is impulsive, lacks empathy and does not encourage you but is critical\shaming\blaming and you often feel like you did as a child. You feel that “something is wrong with you”(internalized shame) when conflicts come up as your partner is not accountable for their part as your parents were not accountable to this day for their part..
. That has been what you have become accustomed to rather than a partner that is “safe”, engages and is present(not perfect) but self-aware and sensitive to you and your needs not just their own needs or preferences. All of this is “familiar” as well as “toxic”. “Familiar does not mean good,or healthy or safe”.
YOUR BOUNDARIES ARE NOT HONORED
Another familiar experience you may be having with mr. or Miss Wrong is being and feeling intruded upon. As a child rather than your boundaries being honored and you being protected and feeling safe. Your voice was not heard. .t Now you struggle to use your voice as an adult and unconsciously choose a partner who does not know how to or have any desire to care and to listen, to hear your voice or your emotional reality. Mr. or Miss Wrong only care about themselves. .. Boundaries are for our protection. In healthy relationships, boundaries provide a foundation where we can feel safe in our bodies and with another without intrusion so that we can truly show up and be our authentic selves.
ANGER MGT ISSUES: EMOTIONAL\PHYSICAL ABUSE
How we manage our emotions when under stress is a critical element in our mental health and our relationships.. .If you are in a relationship where you do not feel emotionally or physically safe then that is a red flag that you need to address not deny or minimize. Moving on and getting help so that this cycle of abuse and the effects of having to live on “high alert” with Mr. or Miss Wrong who has a “short fuse” cannot be an option for you anymore. There is help available and you can get ‘unstuck” as you seek help and heal! courageously
A New Way Forward: Less Reactivity, More Connection
You don’t have to live in cycles of conflict or disconnection. Healing is possible — and it starts with understanding yourself more deeply. You can learn to show up in your relationships with more calm, clarity, and care.
If you’re ready to move beyond emotional drama and into healthy, grounded connection, I’d be honored to walk with you. At Ronee Miller Counseling in Tribeca, I offer in-person therapy that supports real change.
Call 📞 (212) 349-6544 or click here to get started.